Touchy subject this one. First of all, let’s get one thing straight. I am not about to suggest that being fit and superficially attractive is the way to find love. After all different strokes for different folks right? I am however suggesting it will benefit both YOUR heart and YOUR mind on this quest for ‘the one’.
This opinion does not come from, what now feels like a lifetime, staring at Instagram looking at arched back temptresses and 12 pack ab’d males and thinking is this how we get the best partner? It comes from nearly 9 years of day in and out observing, listening, and consoling clients in the mysterious ways of love.
Deep deep deep deep down we ALL want to find love. Some of us have already found it and some of us are still awaiting that lightning strike moment. Let’s focus for the minute on those of us still skipping solo through the streets waiting to find prince/princess charming.
Almost all of my single clients throughout the years have all looked to fitness as the answer to finding love;
“I just want to lose some weight to look better in a dress”
“Can we do abs? I have a date tonight”
What I’ve come to realise is that it’s all about your mind. I can only speak about what I’ve seen over the years but generally people who don’t exercise are more stressed, unhappy, have more injuries, their health status is nowhere near someone who runs, lifts, stretches, watches their food etc. Think about it. In fact, let’s look at me.
I can remember a time when my health was terrible. I still looked ok aesthetically from years of ‘nightclub weights’ (doing chest and arms almost every day for 5 years!). But we’re talking curries, pizza, drinking heavily on the weekend, lack of sleep and hardly any flexibility or mobility. I remember how it felt. I was constantly tired. No one will become attracted to a tired face with black rings around the eyes. I was carrying a little extra body fat. Now on this subject, it’s what makes YOU feel good. I don’t like carrying extra fat so it makes ME feel bad about myself. I find it lazy and unhealthy so that effects my confidence levels. It made me a little more closed in my personality. Not an attractive trait in someone openly looking for love.
I’ve watched clients turn from hunched over, stiff, heavy breathing, unfit versions of themselves into upright, confident, clear skin, glowing, strong individuals and I am telling you right now It’s worked for them in love. If you’re happy in yourself, in how you look, then you exude confidence. Exercising regularly means you have a regular endorphin release which are effectively happy hormones. They make you feel energised, confident and ready to take on the world. Relate that back to sex, we feel the same way after orgasm. So, you’re single and you see 2 versions of a possible partner. Do you go for the unhealthy tired looking one or the glossy, confident, energised version? EXACTLY.
But what about the married or in love lot? The bunch that make the single sick when they can’t stop the PDA’s. We all want that so shuuuuuuut up!
So again I’ve trained these people. They are 70% of my client base. They aren’t always happy happy. They may have been with their partner for years and a little familiarity has kicked in. They come to us citing reasons for improvement in their health and fitness. We always know in that in the background there’s a beauty or attractiveness to the opposite sex element. They want to reignite that spark and be the healthier version of themselves. And what’s wrong with that? I think it’s fantastic. If we exercise we live longer that’s a fact. So a partner will see a benefit in this. We all know how important sex is in a relationship. Imagine holding up your own bodyweight in sex and wheezing or shaking from a lack of fitness…not good is it?
Training for love is an amazing motivator so use it as your fire. You either want to find it or you have it and you want to keep that fire blazing. It works. It really does. Clean up your diet, get to the gym or the park and move people! Tell me your life doesn’t improve and if me ranting at you like this inspires you and you do find love…I want a fucking invite to the wedding!